Miscarriage Support/Help For Grieving

I'm just laying here. There's so much I *could* be doing, but I'm just laying here. Sleep, for starters, would be a good thing, but nope, that doesn't seem to be in my cards. I could be putting the dishes away, or getting laundry started, but I just have no desire to do housework. I could go to the grocery store for some milk since we're all out, but I don't really feel like going anywhere. I could call my Grandma back who is worried about me and keeps calling, but that would require talking. So, I just lay here. (I've written a post about the desire to simply be a 'hermit' right now, but I haven't posted it yet....)

In recent days, with recent posts regarding miscarriage, I've acquired a whole new audience of readers. This gives me some hope. If me sharing my very raw and real feelings of a miscarriage can help someone else in their time of need, then it's worth it for me to be blogging about this- (not to mention it's also therapeutic for me). I know it makes some of my original, loyal readers feel a little uncomfortable, and I promise you I'll try to regain my normal-quirky posts soon, but for now, it is what it is.

I often find a sense of purpose when I visit the ivillage miscarriage message board and offer words of encouragement to those in their time of need. (My screen name there is 'wishiwereamommy').  This includes a list of things that I personally do to help myself grieve. 

Here's a list of things that I personally do to help myself grieve:

1. journaling 

2. blogging

3. message boards

4. counseling (individual and/or couples)

5. acupuncture (love it!)

6. anti-depressant medication (my medication is actually prescribed for my OCD, but can be used as an anti-depressant as well. Do not fault yourself if you decide to get a prescription to help you cope. It is very common.)

7. yoga

8. taking walks during the sunset

9.watching mindless tv ('America's Next Top Model' and 'What Not To Wear' marathons are great for this!)

10. listening to music that I feel I relate to (Michael Buble's 'Lost', John Mayer's 'In Repair', Vanessa Carlton's 'Pretty Baby', etc). -See left column of blog for these songs-
11. Also, I ordered a memorial necklace w/ birthstones for my baby off of www.labelledame.com You can get one to three stones to represent the conception month, and/or miscarriage month, and/or estimated due date month. I also found a guardian angel pin with the miscarriage month's birthstone and I have that sitting on my dashboard in my car to remind me that my baby is looking down on me.

12. Not talking to people if you don't feel like talking

13. Put yourself first!

14. Take one day at a time

15. This one is very important: Accept every emotion as it comes to you. Cry if you feel like crying, scream if you feel like screaming, etc. Don't hold back. The emotions you are feeling are justified. If you allow yourself to feel them as they come you are making strides in your healing. Don't let others tell you how you should or should not be grieving. It is an individual process unique to each and every person and circumstance. There is no right or wrong way. There is no set deadline for when the grieving needs to end. You know what is best for you. Be true to yourself.

"Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up."

Jesse Jackson